Is your attitude setting you up to fail

Today you may have a financially-sound career and you may have earned the respect of your colleagues. But when you get home at the end of the day, everything shifts!   Instead of keeping your attitude up and positive, you feel like something is missing from your life and you seem to take on another persona.   Your personal life is not fulfilling, and your relationships are not enjoyable; even if you have a significant other or “friends” on Facebook something seems to be missing.  Why do you feel the way you do? What triggers in your daily routine keep coming up that bring these past emotional wounds to the surface? Is it the stress of juggling career and home? Is it because you are the breadwinner and you feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders? Or is it because deep inside, you just do not feel good enough to have something or be something better in your life?  As a relationship expert, I want you to know that you are not alone.  There are many people in this world who feel the same way.    However, if I can help you work on your attitude first about yourself, then you will be better prepared to improve your attitude and interaction in your personal life and within all relationships.  Everything in life is about relationships, that is Relationship with self, your job, your boss or teammates, your partner, children, etc.  If you are unable to feel good about yourself, you will not be able to feel healthy or whole in other aspects of your life.  An improved and positive attitude will lead you to a successful life. 

  Remember that little boy or girl who tried so hard to love and to be loved; and no matter what the child tried to do, it seemed to not be good enough for others? Some of you still battle with that child within. You may appear to have balanced lives, comfortable houses, good careers and nice cars… but your relationships are not whole or in harmony — primarily because within your inner being is that little boy or girl, who is still consciously or unconsciously clinging to past experiences. You put up a barricade so that others can never truly enter into your lives because you are fearful that you may be rejected, deprived, neglected or abused.

 How do I overcome my anxieties; you ask? You begin by accepting the past hurts of your life and forgiving yourself and those around you who may have contributed to the feelings and/or the emotional wall that you have built around yourself. Even if you do not reconcile these issues in person, you only need to say aloud, “I accept who I am. I forgive those who have hurt me and I believe I am more than enough.  I forgive myself for holding onto the feelings that I have created in my life. I am free.” Each time any triggers or emotions start creeping up in your life, repeat the mantra above; in fact, repeat it often till you own it.  It will help you sort through your challenges and allow you to move forward guilt-free and uninhibited. Remember, only you have the power to overcome your emotional burdens.  If you continue to focus on what is no longer a part of your life, you will build your metaphorical wall higher and higher until you can no longer see over it.  Become your own relationship expert; Look in the mirror or sit quietly and meditate on who you are.  Do you believe you are more than enough; do you like yourself and all that you have become?  

 “When you change what you believe, you change what you do.”  We all deal with a setback at one time or another.  Those conditions do not have to control you or set you up to be in misery.  Quite the contrary!  Allow them to be a learning lesson and then use them as a stepping - stone to help you rise above as you cultivate a positive and transformational attitude.  

 You are good enough. In fact, you are better than just “good enough”. You are unique in every way. When you begin to see beyond your emotional wall and your poor attitude, you will finally be free from what has chained you for far too long.  

You have the power within to improve all relationships in your life but first, you need to come to terms with your first and most important relations and this with self.    Be conscious as to where you are placing your attention, become a strong relationship expert for yourself.  When you feel love, respect and value towards yourself, your life will begin to shift, and you will begin to live your life on purpose.

 

Joan Marie Ambrose -- Author, Creative Writer, Motivational Speaker

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Blog Date: 
Tuesday, August 20, 2019