Why is love so difficult to find?

For many little girls, becoming a mom, an astronaut, or a famous dancer are just some aspirations their little hearts may have. As they grow and mature into adult women, school and career can start to lose excitement in their lifestyles. They want more than just the education and career - they want someone to share their lives with, to fill the void. Some want a fairytale wedding, or perhaps just a boyfriend with whom they can share their deepest secrets and dreams. The funny thing is that the same dreams little girls have are not far off from goals that little boys have in life. The truth is that every human being wants and needs love to grow and thrive.

Suddenly you are 30+ years old and you find yourself coming back to an empty home at the end of the day. Though this may be perfectly fine for those who prefer the bachelor lifestyle, many of you may be in that place in life where you want more out of life. You want and deeply need that special someone to share conversation, to hold and caress, to feel like you are part of something bigger than just yourself. Now you are wondering why you did not actively pursue a relationship. Or worse, you think you will never find love in your life. So here's a little secret I am going to share with you - you cannot "find" love. Love finds you.

Realistically, we live in a fast-paced society. Those times of long ago where men and women got married, had the 2.5 kids, the house and the wooden picket fence are no longer the norm by today's standards. In fact, more adults are going into relationships today with school loans, mortgage payments, and other forms of baggage. The playing fields are not so cut and dry. We all lead hectic, sometimes challenging

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lifestyles - where time is a precious commodity. We are no longer privileged with time or resources to always do what we want or go or meet others. But if there is a will, there is a way.

First off, let's get away from the whole "finding" love attitude. Yes, it is true that you need to be out and about to meet others, but love is not necessarily something you can find. In life, if love is meant to be, it will catch you off guard when you least expect it. Sometimes, we are so busy with work, home and life that we do not take the time to see the love that may be right in front of us. It may be a colleague, a person you see from time to time at the grocery store, a fellow club member, or even someone on social media who has peaked an interest in you. When you stop "looking" so hard for love, you might surprise yourself with all the prospects around you. Love is perpetual and lies in wait for the right match to come along. It is not about moving mountains to make love happen, it is about seeing love for what it is and how to make love work for you and a significant other when the opportunity presents itself.

You start by loving yourself first and understanding that self-confidence is key to achieving a long-term relationship. Once you are comfortable in your own skin, others will see you for who you are and realize the potential in you. The same is true when you raise your awareness to those around you with that same level of confidence. So why is love so difficult to find? You tell me - stop looking and start being aware to those around you. You might just fall in love with the perfect person for you.

Joan Marie Ambrose -- Author, Creative Writer, Motivational Speaker

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Blog Date: 
Thursday, February 27, 2014